Let Go

On April Fool's Day I let go of a lot of baggage. My beautiful and talented friend Jessica kindly squeezed me into her busy schedule to help me out. She cut about a foot and a half of my hair and transformed me into a stylish mama!

When my little sister was diagnosed with cancer last Spring and then talked of shaving her head at some point I told her I'd do it with her. We had always had long braids together as kids and shared the same thick brown hair. I thought it would be a good bonding experience to do this together, and for her to not be alone in it. But when the time came in the Fall and she decided to go for it she told me not to, saying that I have such nice hair and she wants me to keep it. She is so sweet!

Well, if it wasn't going to be shaved something had to be done with it. It had become a cumbersome unmanageable mess that always ended up twisted tightly into a bun high on top of my head. Although I kind of liked the look, it wasn't cute and I don't think my husband was appreciating the Bun + Headband style at all.

Another default hairdo was the ponytail braid. This soon became a dangerous weapon that would whip me in the face while doing jumping jacks. It would get caught up in my jump rope, nearly tripping me. Once my workouts are in jeopardy something's got to change!

I kept saying I'd cut it after I lost another 10 pounds or so, but it was time to just go for it and embrace the change. It's about appreciating where I'm at in my life right now and not putting anything off for a special occasion or until I feel I'm more worthy. Other than my senior year of high school and a short time in college I've always had super long hair. I've played it safe and just kept it plain and simple.

To me short hair screams high maintenance. It requires more frequent cuts which takes time and money. It takes time and effort (if thick and frizzy like mine) to style it too. So it seems irresponsible for me, the girl who's always let her Step Mom trim it in the kitchen, to have short hair.

Another excuse to stay in my comfort zone was that my baby loves to play with my side braid and twiddle it around in his fingers. He gives the biggest giggles and explodes in laughter when I tickle his face with it, especially while he nurses. He swings the braid around while I hold him and he looks up at me with pure delight.

But refreshing change was much needed. The moment Jessica cut the braid off I felt instant relief- a load was lifted off my shoulders. My baby recognized me, thank goodness, and my husband is a fan. A few days later it seems my scalp and head have relaxed from not being pulled tightly almost 24/7. But best if all is the fresh feeling I've got now that I let go of some extra baggage.

Walk This Way

Our lives just got a lot more interesting; we're really in for it now! Not five minutes after my husband got home from work was Ari walking for us! Literally 'for' us and not really 'to' us- he was completely showing off and cracking himself up. He hopped up and took two solid steps. He was giddy with excitement and so were we. He proceeded to do this again with a giant water bottle in hand as well, which kind of freaked Dad out but I think it was helping him stay balanced. He did it for Sammy, the cat, then he scampered off down the dark hallway and did it some more.

He is most secure and able to walk best when he's gotten up on his own, unassisted. We've never been into holding his hands up to 'help' him walk. Both my hubby and I didn't naturally feel led to do so, and we didn't want him using 'walkers' or walking aids. He's always been so good at exploring on his own and we want to allow him to develop at his own pace, which seems to actually accelerate things. When we step back, he steps it up! This is true with pretty much everything for Ari.

This is a special night 'cause we aren't typically awake when Dad comes home from work. Ari must've been super excited for our family time and taken the opportunity to show off his new skill. We are so excited to have both been present!

He actually took his first steps yesterday though, supposedly. I really believe he's been practicing behind our backs for awhile, that stinker. His first steps were, where else, but at the gym! That's quite fitting for our family. He walked to Nick, one of the Childcare workers at The Belmont Athletic Club, just a few days after turning 11 months.

We hope and pray that we can continue to keep up with Ari! We pray he'll always have the confidence needed to move forward in life and that he'll step out in faith in all he does. We want him to know the safety and security of having us to fall back on whenever he needs or wants us. But mainly we want his confidence to come from knowing he is created with great purpose and loved and cared for by God.

The title of this post is a little something my dad has always said. His knees would give out while walking and, being the silly guy he is, he'd make fun of himself with this expression. It's always been a favorite of mine because it reminds me of him. Now with my baby son walking and exploring new territory I find myself only caring that he walk one way- toward love.

Here's a picture of Ari on the day he walked- Wednesday April 3rd, 2013.